Thursday, May 26, 2016

Lesbian Finds Jesus and Changes Her Life

Of course for the past 10 years we have all heard the incessant battle cry of LGBT advocates yelling, "We/they were BORN THIS WAY!" whatever you want, live however you want, copulate with anyone or anything you want but don't keep yelling BORN THIS WAY if you also claim to be a believer in the Word of God and a follower of Christ.  The entire point of the Gospel is that WE WERE ALL BORN THAT WAY...born into death and sin.  We are BORN sinners!

Some are born with a bend towards selfishness in that they struggle with sharing more than anything else!  Some are born with a struggle against gluttony.  They were born with an addiction to stuffing themselves and end up obese.  Some were born with a struggle to tell the truth...they are pathological liars....but here is the point, there is healing for EVERYONE through the power of Jesus.

"But Dennis, certainly you don't believe that Jesus can change a person's gay desires and take away a lesbian's desire to be sexual with other women?"

Yep...I believe the Creator of the Universe, who can create stars and planets, can also change a gay person's desires, an obese person's food addiction, a selfish man's heart and any other sinful behavior that we need changed.

It took me a couple of years before I could work up the courage to go back home for a visit. I wouldn't go alone and took my girlfriend, Ann, and her daughter, with me. My mom was very warm and welcoming, even loving toward all three of us. I thought perhaps things had changed in the nearly seven years I'd been gone.

She pulled me aside and said, "Michelle, I love you, and you are all welcome to stay here tonight, but you'll have to sleep in separate rooms."

I was mad, but I understood and appreciated the forewarning. We went to a hotel.

Mom continued to love on us by sending cards and money on birthdays and holidays. I joked it wasn't fair Ann got the same amount of money on her birthday as I did from my parents.

I was beginning to calm down, to live a more stable life, one that wouldn't cause the neighbors to blush. Normal. I thought perhaps I should also pursue a more normal religious identity. I was still seeking God. I knew I couldn't return to mainstream Christianity, just the thought of it still gave me the heebie-jeebies, but I had a deep longing I couldn't satisfy. I was still writing, reading and viewing porn.

I began studying Kabbalah and the Zohar (both Jewish mysticism), and I decided I needed to talk to a rabbi, to learn as much about the foundational aspects of Judaism as possible before I could truly attain proficiency in Jewish mysticism. At the time, this seemed to fall within the realm of "normal" for me. I met with a rabbi in the Reformed tradition, one who assured me it was OK to continue my life as a practicing lesbian.

Although the thought of entering a Christian church or speaking to any of my former mentors and friends who were Christians almost sickened me, I could read the Bible if I was doing it to pursue Jewish knowledge. I stuck to the Old Testament, which kept me safe from the pesky and disturbing writings of Paul. I couldn't deal with Jesus either, but that was OK for now. He seemed safely ensconced in the New Testament.

What I didn't intend during my course of study was to have feelings about God emerge. I began to sense an awareness of Him again. My previous experiences into other forms of spirituality (or non-spirituality) had always been to soothe an ache, but had always been unsuccessful. They were fun, scary, encouraging or wishful, but never fulfilling. I began to pray the serenity prayer and the 23rd Psalm.

More than a year passed as I met with the rabbi once a week, alone and in a small group. I rarely went to synagogue. I am an introvert by nature, and couldn't seem to break into this Jewish family in any meaningful way. Finally, Rabbi M. told me it was time to pick a date for my official conversion ceremony.

Within days of the announcement, I received devastating news. Aunt Jan, dearly beloved and only 11 years older than me, had died unexpectedly. My entire family felt this loss deeply. I drove with my girlfriend to Oklahoma to the funeral.

As I sat in the funeral home chapel, listening to a sermon by a very inexperienced friend of my uncle's, I heard a voice say to me, "You can't give up Jesus."

I turned my head to the left and to the right, but no one was looking at me.

"You can't give up Jesus."

Again, I looked around and no one was paying any attention to me. It repeated again, and perhaps one more time.

I found myself saying, "I can't give up Jesus. I can't give up Jesus."

The voice of the minister had faded. I wasn't aware of anything except that thought. I knew to convert to Judaism was to deny Jesus. It turned out I wasn't prepared to do that.

Strangely, even in spite of hearing an audible voice inside my head, I continued to be lost. I searched on the internet for an acceptable church. When I would find a local church that accepted and endorsed the gay lifestyle, I would get excited and go try it out. However, I never went back to any of those churches. It was as if there was a heavy cloud over every single one of them. It was like a giant room lit with only a few 25-watt bulbs. Any church that would accept me as a practicing lesbian lacked all credibility with me. I knew it was wrong, and having someone tell me it was right made me lose all respect for their authority.

I began reading theologians in what is called Progressive Christianity such as Marcus Borg and John Shelby Spong. While their theology was appealing to someone who wanted Jesus without sacrifice, Christ without obedience, I was still hungry. The intellectual spin was interesting, but didn't sound the bell of truth in my spirit. I had experienced a relationship with God when I was a child. I longed to be deeply loved and cherished by Him.

Excerpt from Prodigal Pursued by Michelle X. Smith. Former Assistant District Attorney, Michelle spent nearly 25 years as an out, loud, and proud lesbian. A feminist, separatist and anarchist, she wandered through New Age beliefs, witchcraft, Buddhism, agnosticism and all the other "isms" available to explore. At last she encountered the undeniable, indescribable love of Jesus, and everything changed. Today Michelle not only reaches out to touch the LGBT community with the love of God, but also speaks to the church, sharing a message of hope to those who feel they have lost a   loved one to the LGBT lifestyle.


How tragic that so many churches have now caved into the WE WERE BORN THIS WAY argument. They no longer share the love and truth with their gay parishioners.  How much longer before they refuse to share the truth with their adulterous or fornicating parishioners?  How much longer before they refuse to say the word SIN from the pulpit?

"Here at the Valley of the Good Shepherd, we choose not to talk about divisive we steer clear of sermons on sin, repentance and hell and we also limit our use of the Bible from the pulpit because our studies show that a lot of people are offended by large parts of the Bible...and we want to be a welcoming place, not a place where people feel uncomfortable or convicted of anything."

Ish!  No wonder Jesus said he is going to vomit the Last Days churches out of his mouth!  He definitely should!


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