Demisexuality. It’s a Real Thing. Really!!

If you are going to stay “woke” you better spend time every morning understanding the thousands of new words and pronouns you will need to know in order to navigate the new sexualities and genders that are popping up like like popcorn.  Today we learn a new sexual orientation called demisexual.  This is when a person can’t get sexually attracted to another person unless there is a strong emotional bond first.  So being demisexual can be a real problem because imagine the horror and embarrassment of being an 18 year old girl at college getting ready to hump every guy you can only to find out you are NOT sexually turned on when you crawl into bed with someone you just met!  For sure we need to add a D to the LGBTQIA alphabet.  Also please remember that if you don’t understand this malady you may be demiphobic.

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Earlier this year, when then-New York Governor Andrew Cuomo’s daughter, Michaela Kennedy-Cuomo, came out as ‘demisexual’, she was met with public condescension. Many mocked her  demisexuality – a lack of sexual attraction to others without a strong emotional connection. Few acknowledged demisexuality as ‘real’.

But although demisexuality isn’t widely known, it’s a sexual orientation like any other, that applies to people across the world.

Demisexuality, which falls on the asexuality spectrum, differs from simply wanting to wait for a deep bond to form before having sex with someone; rather, it’s more akin to the experience of being asexual until that type of connection forms, at which point the sexual attraction extends only to that person. For allosexuals, on the other hand (people who aren’t on the asexual spectrum), waiting to have sex until forming a deep connection is more of a preference, and less of necessity to developing sexual desire.

Kennedy-Cuomo’s announcement did have positive effects, says Kayla Kaszyca, a demisexual co-creator of the podcast Sounds Fake But Okay, in which she and her asexual, aromantic co-host Sarah Costello discuss love, relationships and sexuality on the asexual spectrum. In some cases, Kaszyca says Kennedy-Cuomo’s statement raised the profile of demisexuality, stoking “more discourse about it”.

https://www.bbc.com/worklife/article/20211101-why-demisexuality-is-as-real-as-any-sexual-orientation